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QUESTIONS YOU CAN ASK YOURSELF

Almost daily new questions are added. You can also follow them on instagram.

A simple way to stop circling around in your head A simple way to stop circling around in your head πŸ™ŒπŸ»
What is my niche in coaching? CHANGE What is my niche in coaching? CHANGE
What if your most powerful role model is not someo What if your most powerful role model is not someone out there but you in the future?
In this episode, we'll dive into the psychology of future self continuity. Why your brain often treats future you like a stranger, and how to close that gap so you can act today in alignment with the person you want to become.

This is not about willpower. It is about clarity.
It is about setting non-negotiables, reducing mental noise, and making your future self the standard you live by.

You will learn:
β€’ Why you still reach for the donut even if you want a six pack later
β€’ How to design yourself as your own role model
β€’ The science behind decision fatigue and how to beat it
β€’ Simple questions to connect with your future self daily

Your future is not waiting for you. It is being built choice by choice right now.

Listen. Reflect. And start designing the self you will be proud of.

Check the link in bio or reply 'Rolemodel' for the full article and video. 

#FutureSelf #PersonalGrowth #Mindset #SelfDiscipline #Neuroscience
Why β€œI Know How You Feel” Might Be a Trap Som Why β€œI Know How You Feel” Might Be a Trap

Some β€˜self-help influencers’ aren’t just β€œbeing relatable”, they’re running a playbook. And it means they get many followers but its not helping, instead it’s doing harm. 

It feels personal, but it’s not. It’s psychological engineering that can train your brain to stay in victim mode. You get comfort instead of tools. Connection instead of independence.

The more you feel β€œseen” by them, the more you trust them and the less you trust yourself. That’s not empowerment. That’s dependency.

In this video I take you into this playbook so you can recognise it the next time you see it. 

Reply with β€˜playbook’ and I’ll send you the link
Reply COMMIT and I’ll send you the link to the f Reply COMMIT and I’ll send you the link to the full Article & Video. Or just check the link in my bio. 

If you’re not committed, you will not fall in love.
Commitment creates love, not the other way around. 
That’s it.

🎧 Full episode linked in bio.

#RealLove #CommitmentMatters #ModernDating #AttachmentStyles #RelationshipGrowth #BuiltNotFound #LoveIsBuilt #FallInLove #EmotionalLeadership #SecureLove
The Two faces of Sensitivity Some people express The Two faces of Sensitivity 

Some people express their boundaries. Others go quiet. 
One sets limits. The other just endures.. until they snap. (spoiler alert -> me) 

This is your reminder:
Silence doesn’t mean someone’s fine.
It means they’ve been holding it in too long.

Two faces of sensitivity. One truth: all emotion deserves to be seen.

Would you like to see the whole video? Go to the link in the bio to all videos!

#stoicsensitive #emotionalintelligence #boundaries #highlysensitiveperson
By default not chasing what’s good for you. Rep By default not chasing what’s good for you.

Reply with GOOD to get the link to the video/article ⬇️

Your brain is trained to value what’s hard to get. In every part of your life. 
Not per definition what’s good for you.
That’s not β€˜optimal’ chemistry. That’s a glitch.

Stop rewarding inconsistency.
Start choosing alignment.
Let peace feel like power again.

This isn’t self-help.
It’s neuroscience.

#brainrewiring #dopamine #scarcitymindset #selfawareness #datingpsychology #neuroscience #mentalclarity  #chooseclarity
If you come across situation in which you would li If you come across situation in which you would like to feel, act or react differently try to RESET. 

Respond to this post with the word RESET and I’ll send you the link with the video & article. 

RESET is a 5-step method to train your brain to respond the way you like,  based on neuroscience.

R - Recognise what’s automatic
E - Examine the story
S - Shift the lens
E - Engage with what’s true
T - Train the new path

Because smart minds run on great systems.
For the FULL VIDEO reply with β€˜secure’ I’ll For the FULL VIDEO reply with β€˜secure’ I’ll send you the link!

β€˜What Securely Attached People Experience’
So many of you responded to my article about secure attachment, so I decided to go deeper. In this video, I explore how securely attached people experience dating with avoidant or anxious partners, why they often feel like they’re β€œtoo much,” and how modern dating dynamics can leave even the healthiest people confused. I also share insights on how anxious attachment in men is misread as weakness, and why choosing the right partner shapes your entire future.
After 20+ years building projects within action sp After 20+ years building projects within action sports and sub cultures  industries, I’ve noticed something:

Fulfillment isn’t just luck.
It’s a structure. A set of ingredients that give your life direction, depth and flow. 

For me, it looks like this:
πŸ„β€β™€οΈ Passion - your spark
🧭 Purpose - your direction
πŸ‘₯ People - your influence
🎠 Play - your freedom
πŸ’ͺ Performance β€” your foundation

I wake up by swimming with my horses.
I coach people in profound changes.
But these 5 elements apply whether you’re leading a team, creating a project, recovering from burnout, or just asking, what’s next for me?

When one is off, everything can feel stuck.
When they align, life clicks into place.

Curious? Watch the reel.
Want to explore how these show up in your life? Message me.
Let’s take the next step, together.

~ Bianca

#PersonalGrowth #LifeCoach #PurposeAndPassion #AuthenticLiving #FlowAndFulfillment #WomenInSports #MentalResilience #BiancaKersteCoaching
Decided to do a trial to address the topics of my Decided to do a trial to address the topics of my articles in a video. What do you think? And how do you increase your sense of freedom? Is having many options making you feel free? Or are the options you can choose differently every day making you feel free? Even if you make the same choice every day?
Two coaching sessions, one similar topic. Read abo Two coaching sessions, one similar topic. Read about why you are programmed to self sabotage potential success and how to deal with that. And where the moment of β€˜greatness’ lies, if only you can stand to go against the program running your 🧠. 

Link in bio
When you are the secure one but feel like the craz When you are the secure one but feel like the crazy one? Came across this too many times as a coach so decided to find out what is happening πŸ’” 

Link in bio
Carl Jung once said, β€œUntil you make the unconsc Carl Jung once said, β€œUntil you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

Most of our daily thoughts, reactions, and choices are not conscious. They come from old stories, past experiences, inherited beliefs. If you never stop to examine them, they keep running your life. Read more about this in the latest article -> link in bio
In my latest article’The Hidden Killer of Every In my latest article’The Hidden Killer of Every Relationship’ I unravel this and the reason many keep on feeling disappointed in people.  And of course what to do about it! 

Check the link in bio!
You’ve been taught to focus on the dream. To vis You’ve been taught to focus on the dream.
To visualize success and keep your thoughts positive.

But what if the real mental power comes from doing the opposite?

There’s one habit that builds clarity, resilience, and calmβ€”but no one talks about it.

Want to know what it is?

To Read the article, check the link in bio
Positive Vibes Only β€˜Let me put my sadness in a Positive Vibes Only
β€˜Let me put my sadness in a gratitude jar and vibe harder’ 🫠

If you’ve ever felt personally victimized by an affirmation or mildly attacked by a motivational quote, this one’s for you.
Turns out, forcing happiness might actually be… making us miserable. Who knew?

New article up.
Spoiler: Real joy isn’t scared of a little sadness.
(Link in bio)
#VibeResponsibly #ToxicPositivity #CoachingThatDoesntSuck #EmotionalFitnessIsHo

How toxic positivity amplifies distress and increase the risk of anxiety and depression.
Half a Life by Gibran Khalil Gibran Do not love h Half a Life
by Gibran Khalil Gibran

Do not love half lovers
Do not entertain half friends 
Do not indulge in works of the half talented
Do not live half a life 
and do not die a half death
If you choose silence, then be silent
When you speak, do so until you are finished
Do not silence yourself to say something
And do not speak to be silent
If you accept, then express it bluntly
Do not mask it
If you refuse then be clear about it 
for an ambiguous refusal is but a weak acceptance
Do not accept half a solution
Do not believe half truths
Do not dream half a dream
Do not fantasize about half hopes
Half a drink will not quench your thirst
Half a meal will not satiate your hunger
Half the way will get you no where
Half an idea will bear you no results
Your other half is not the one you love
It is you in another time yet in the same space
It is you when you are not
Half a life is a life you didn't live, 
A word you have not said
A smile you postponed 
A love you have not had
A friendship you did not know
To reach and not arrive
Work and not work
Attend only to be absent
What makes you a stranger to them closest to you
and they strangers to you
The half is a mere moment of inability
but you are able for you are not half a being
You are a whole that exists to live a life 
not half a life
Gibran Khalil Gibran
Struggling to stay disciplined? 𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘡π˜ͺ𝘀𝘦 𝘰𝘡𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘒𝘳𝘦?

𝘈 𝘭𝘰𝘡 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝗁𝗂𝗍 π—π–Ίπ—…π—…π—Œ 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 π—€π—ˆπ—‚π—‡π—€ π—€π–Ύπ—π—Œ π—π—ˆπ—Žπ—€π—. π–‘π—Žπ— 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝖿𝖿𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗇𝖼𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝗍𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗇 π—‰π—Žπ—Œπ—π—‚π—‡π—€ π—π—π—‹π—ˆπ—Žπ—€π— 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗀𝗂𝗏𝗂𝗇𝗀 π—Žπ—‰ π—‚π—Œ π—‡π—ˆπ— π–Ίπ–»π—ˆπ—Žπ— π—π—‚π—…π—…π—‰π—ˆπ—π–Ύπ—‹, π–»π—Žπ— π—π—ˆπ— π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ 𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇 π—‚π—Œ 𝗐𝗂𝗋𝖾𝖽?

𝖨𝗇 π–Ίπ–Όπ—π—‚π—ˆπ—‡ π—Œπ—‰π—ˆπ—‹π—π—Œ, π—’π—ˆπ—Žβ€™π—‹π–Ύ π–Ώπ—ˆπ—‹π–Όπ–Ύπ–½ π—π—ˆ π–Όπ—ˆπ—‡π–Ώπ—‹π—ˆπ—‡π— 𝖿𝖾𝖺𝗋, π—‰π—π—’π—Œπ—‚π–Όπ–Ίπ—… π—Œπ—π—‹π–Ίπ—‚π—‡, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗅 π–Ώπ–Ίπ—π—‚π—€π—Žπ–Ύβ€”π–Ίπ—…π—… 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗋𝖾𝗐𝖺𝗋𝖽𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 π–½π—ˆπ—‰π–Ίπ—†π—‚π—‡π–Ύ 𝖺𝗇𝖽 π–Ύπ—‡π–½π—ˆπ—‹π—‰π—π—‚π—‡π—Œ 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 π—’π—ˆπ—Ž π—‰π—Žπ—Œπ— π—π—π—‹π—ˆπ—Žπ—€π—. π–³π—π—‚π—Œ π—Žπ—‡π—‚π—Šπ—Žπ–Ύ π–Όπ—ˆπ—†π–»π—ˆ π—π—‹π–Ίπ—‚π—‡π—Œ π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ 𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇 π—π—ˆ 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗅𝖾 π–½π—‚π—Œπ–Όπ—ˆπ—†π–Ώπ—ˆπ—‹π—, π–Ύπ–Ώπ–Ώπ—ˆπ—‹π—, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 π–Όπ—π–Ίπ—…π—…π–Ύπ—‡π—€π–Ύπ—Œ 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 π—‚π—β€™π—Œ π—Œπ–Ύπ–Όπ—ˆπ—‡π–½ π—‡π–Ίπ—π—Žπ—‹π–Ύ.

𝖢𝖺𝗇𝗍 π—π—ˆ (help others) 𝖻𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄 (further) π—π—π—‹π—ˆπ—Žπ—€π— π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹/their π—ˆπ—π—‡ π—…π—‚π—†π—‚π—π—Œ? π– π–Όπ—π—‚π—ˆπ—‡ π—Œπ—‰π—ˆπ—‹π—π—Œ 𝗆𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝖻𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 π—Œπ–Ύπ–Όπ—‹π–Ύπ— π—π—ˆ 𝗋𝖾𝗐𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ 𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇 π–Ώπ—ˆπ—‹ π—‹π–Ύπ—Œπ—‚π—…π—‚π–Ύπ—‡π–Όπ–Ύ 𝖺𝗇𝖽 π–½π—‚π—Œπ–Όπ—‚π—‰π—…π—‚π—‡π–Ύβ€”π—π—‚π—π—π—ˆπ—Žπ— 𝗍𝗁𝖾 π—Žπ—Œπ—Žπ–Ίπ—… 𝗀𝗋𝗂𝗇𝖽.

When you start π—‰π—Žπ—Œπ—π—‚π—‡π—€ π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ π—…π—‚π—†π—‚π—π—Œ, yπ—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ 𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄 π—’π—ˆπ—Ž. 𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽 π—†π—ˆπ—‹π–Ύ π–Ίπ–»π—ˆπ—Žπ— π—π—ˆπ— π–Ίπ–Όπ—π—‚π—ˆπ—‡ π—Œπ—‰π—ˆπ—‹π—π—Œ 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾 π—’π—ˆπ—Žπ—‹ π–»π—‹π–Ίπ—‚π—‡β€™π—Œ π—‹π–Ύπ—Œπ—‰π—ˆπ—‡π—Œπ–Ύ π—π—ˆ π–Ύπ–Ώπ–Ώπ—ˆπ—‹π— on www.biancakersten.com

#π–±π–Ύπ—Œπ—‚π—…π—‚π–Ύπ—‡π–Όπ–Ύ #π–¬π—‚π—‡π–½π—Œπ–Ύπ— #π– π–Όπ—π—‚π—ˆπ—‡π–²π—‰π—ˆπ—‹π—π—Œ #π–­π–Ύπ—Žπ—‹π—ˆπ—Œπ–Όπ—‚π–Ύπ—‡π–Όπ–Ύ #π–¬π—ˆπ—π—‚π—π–Ίπ—π—‚π—ˆπ—‡
With millions of people dating in Europe, you’d With millions of people dating in Europe, you’d think real connections would be easier to find… but attraction is more about uncertainty and power dynamics than compatibility. 😳

Ever noticed that after showing genuine kindness, someone loses interest? Why does that happen? πŸ€”

Emotional chaos feels like love for some, but it’s just stress messing with your brain. 🧠

Want to learn how to avoid falling for emotional games? πŸ’ͺ

➑️ Check out the full article and learn how to date with confidence! Check www.biancakersten.com
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